First Date

At long last, there was a plan for the aforementioned date.  After going back and forth via text without a ever making a plan, he finally suggested we meet around 9 at a restaurant downtown.  I agreed, slightly annoyed, since I could have much better planned my day (outfit) around a later meeting time, but figured it wasn't the worst thing in the world.  I may be uptight at times, but wouldn't hold it against the guy.

I realized immediately that it the lack of plan and last-minute decisions were not an excuse to play games-- he is just completely free-spirited and relaxed.  It didn't seem to phase him that I showed up 30 minutes latte (traffic, I swear), whereas that would have driven me crazy.

He picked a really cute restaurant called Esperanto, on 9th and Avenue C.  I've never been as far east as C, and it was surprisingly quaint and very quiet.  The restaurant was on a corner and had two blocks of outdoor seating, so we grabbed a table right by one of the windows-- from there, we could faintly hear the Latin music that was playing from the live band inside.

photo courtesy of NubiaMag

The food was Brazilian-inspired; to start, we split potato and cod croquettes and roasted mussels.  The mussels were wonderfully crispy and garlicky-- perfect with a squeeze of lime on top.  The croquettes were to salty for my taste, and they tasted more like salty fried hush puppies.  Something I would definitely skip next time... though I can see their appeal after a few drinks.  As an entree, I had seared tuna, topped with a roasted pepper and avocado salsa.  Overall it was good, the flavors didn't pop, but the fish was cooked perfectly.  And the caipirinhas were amazing.  We then went for a drink next door to this tiny cocktail lounge called Louis 649 which was really cool-- dark lighting, old jazz music, and great cocktails.

He was certainly very different than anyone I've been out with before.  He was interesting, interested, considerate, very into New York, optimistic, artsy, free-spirited...if nothing else, it was a bit of a reality check.  Not only are there so many different types of (single!) people on this island, I could learn a lot from each of them.  I'm not sure if there will be a second date, but if nothing else, I could probably relax a little... it'll take a while, but maybe not making a plan three days in advance isn't the worst thing someone can do.  Though I'll keep hoping for it.

Is it too much to ask for a plan?

I met someone at a happy hour this past Friday.  Though we only spoke for a short amount of time, he seemed smart, cute, nice enough... basically he was completely unoffensive which, considering the past few I've dated, is grounds for consideration.  We exchanged numbers and went about our separate plans for the night, with the notion that we would touch base later in case our paths crossed.  They didn't, of course, but he did send a text saying how nice it was to meet me and that he would like to buy me dinner or drinks sometime soon.  +1, happy hour man.

He texted me a few more times, and then asked on Monday to let him know if I were free this week and wanted to hang out; an approach which still leaves me in a state of wonder.  It's not as if we are close enough that "let me know when you're free" qualifies as making a date.  Why wouldn't he just ask if I were free on a certain day and actually make a plan?  Or better yet-- call?

But he's cute and I want to give it a chance, so I responded with a definitive "I'm free Thursday".  He said great, that's what he was thinking as well (then why didn't he suggest it?), and he will think of a plan.  So here we are, one night before our first date, and there's no plan. 

Moving forward, I am trying to keep an open mind in my dating career.  But this is one thing that I'm not really interested in compromising.  In my book, "we'll hang out" does not a plan make.  Why is it so hard to commit to a time and a place?  Is the nonchalance an indication that things are too casual, or is it a means of protection?  Is it a way to play games-- and if so, do I leave my entire night open, waiting to see if this "date" materializes, or tell him something came up since he didn't make plans?  I don't know this guy, but I have the sense he's not trying to play games-- and I'm holding out hope that he will pull through tonight and make a plan before I write it off.  I have to draw the line somewhere.  Stay tuned...

Lambrusco

It seems that each season I get on a kick and have a new drink that I have to have...all the time.  Last summer is was rose wine.  A couple winters ago it was mulled wine.  Prosecco and sea breezes... well, I suppose those are year-round.

My wine du jour is Lambrusco wine, which is a perfect red for the spring and summer.  White wine is fine, but I'm generally much more interested in red.  Lambrusco, from the Emiglia-Romagna region in Italy, is a crisp red with a gentle effervescence-- much less than that of Prosecco-- and fruity but not sweet. 

I first tried this in Italy with pizza, served chilled and in a juice glass.  I can imagine it working well with anything from grilled chicken to pizza to a summer panzanella.  Lambrusco had a bad reputation in the US after the 1970's, but the true Lambrusco wine is nothing like the overly sweet wine which was super trendy back then.  (or so I've heard...)  It's showing up more and more in restaurants-- or better yet, look out for it at your wine store, since it will be at least 300% cheaper there.

Labrusca Lambrusco, retails for about $15

Seeing Red

Red lipstick is one of those things that has so many different meanings.  Worn correctly, it can be trendy, classic, confident, sexy, and powerful.  Worn incorrectly... well, you run the risk of looking a little like Courtney Love.

I've been wanting to try red lipstick for a while now, and have been talking about it and googling pictures of Cameron Diaz and Kate Bostworth with red lipstick juuuust to see what it might look like on me if I somehow morphed into a tall thin blonde gorgeous movie star.

Now I love me some makeup (always have, always will), but I just couldn't pull the trigger on the red lipstick.  But this past weekend, after 30 minutes, countless shades, and one very patient friend's opinion (thanks!), I finally walked out of Sephora with what what was the closest-to-perfect shade of red we could find.  It's red enough to still be considered "red lipstick", but has enough of a coral/orange undertone to still be fresh and trendy. 

I hesitantly debuted it to brunch this weekend.  I didn't want to look like I was trying to hard, but I kept touching and pursing my lips since I was hyper-conscious of them (and the apply-blot-apply method looks great but completely dries out your lips.  Must figure that out).  After an entire brunch (including one re-application!)... my friends didn't even mention my lipstick.  That means one of three things: 1. it looked so natural they didn't even realize it was new 2. it looked so terrible they were embarrassed to say anything 3. wearing lipstick isn't as big a deal as I thought. 

It definitely is more of an effort than the usual "sheer lipbalm", but I'm going to try to start incorporating it into my makeup routine.  As long as it looks like I'm not trying too hard.



NARS lipstick in Jungle Red, $22



Early to Bed, Early to Rise

The weather this morning was of a quintessentially perfect spring day.  After plans to see a visiting friend were ruined by the monsoon which hit NYC last night, we decided to do brunch this morning.  The catch: she was heading out of the city this afternoon, so it had to be early.  Luckily the rain prevented any of us from going out last night, so waking up was not a problem...but brunch at 10am?  I wondered if they even served brunch at 10.  No one goes to Sunday brunch until noon at the earliest.  But then I realized there are benefits to starting your day that early-- such as being able to get into any restaurant you want.

This opened up more options than I knew what to do with, since there is usually at least an hour wait for all the "good" places.  I decided we should go to Friend of a Farmer on Irving Place.  The restaurant has a very kitschy yet rustic feel, with a huge stone fireplace and heavy floral wallpaper not unlike an old grandmother's house.  There are baskets of fresh produce which line the stairs, and you are immediately welcomed by a sign which reads "BE NICE".  How cute is that?

Photo courtesy of nycsunflower

We were early enough that we grabbed a table outside in the sun.  Each of us ordered a different egg dish-- I went with the Healthy Farmer's Omelette-- an egg white omelette filled with fresh spinach and feta cheese, served in a small cast-iron skillet.  It was supposed to include tomatoes as well, which they unfortunately forgot.  It was good nonetheless, and came with a heaping side of their homefries-- cute into tiny cubes so they are wonderfully crispy.  The dish was a little heavy for my taste, but I always feel that way when I order eggs in a restaurant.  I should remember that for next time...  Every other dish which came out looked equally as delicious-- from the pancakes bursting with blueberries to the creamy yogurt topped with fresh fruit and granola-- it is definitely a place I would like to come back to and try something new.

photo courtesy of Forget me Not

Oh, and about heading to brunch early?  I think we're onto something here.  There was about a two hour wait once we left.

Friend of a Farmer

77 Irving Place (between 18th and 19th)

212-477-2188

www.friendofafarmerny.com

Houdini

I have to warn you ahead of time that this will not be the last time I'll post about this topic.  I almost don't even know where to start.  But what is it makes that so many twenty-something guys (I'm hesitant to say "men"...) feel so entitled?  In their so-called version of dating, the "relationship" ultimately is defined by what they want.  I just heard about a mutual friend of mine who was dating someone for almost two years.  They were very close, happy, had a great relationship; a few weeks ago he was talking about how someday he would propose and convert to Judaism for her.  Then, out of the blue, he started to distance himself from her, until he finally told her he decided he wasn't really into her or the relationship anymore and didn't feel like dating.  That was it.  She called him a couple days later to get some sort of explanation as to why he just went dark (good for her!), but he never called back.  And that was the end of that.

I've found that so many of the guys I've dated have acted in a frighteningly similar way (don't worry...stories to come).  To me, it shows an immaturity and sense of entitlement that is hard for me to comprehend.  Since when did it become acceptable to just disappear?  Is it that they are too immature to have an adult conversation, or are they too immature to care?  Perhaps at this age they feel as if they are finally making money and have enough power to do whatever they feel like.  Or maybe they feel that once things start to become boring or difficult, they lose interest...and disappear.  Or do they act like this because we allow them to?  Many of us attempt to be kind, fun, breezy, and accomodating-- especially when in the beginning-- but can it be too much?  Should we be more demanding and no-nonsense at the start so they know we deserve at least the respect of a breakup?

The Big Cheese

It was my roommate's birthday this weekend, so I threw a little party for her and some of our closest friends before we went downtown for the night.  I must have been a housewife in a previous/current/former life because hosting and cooking for others is one of my absolute favorite things to do.  To keep the feel of a casual cocktail party, I decided on making an antipasti spread so that everyone could just do their own thing.  It was absolutely gorgeous out on Saturday so I wanted to keep it light, fresh, and summery.  I had a few of my favorite things set out-- roasted red and yellow peppers, grilled egglpant and zucchini, fresh tomatoes, and lemon-oregano roasted chicken-- all covered with a generous sprinking of basil.*

I didn't even make the best thing I was serving (how's that for a blow to my cuinary confidence?)-- bread and cheese.  Not just any bread and cheese.  Olive bread and mozzarella.  And not just ANY olive bread and mozzarella.  Homemade black olive bread from Madonia Brother's Bakery (what whaaaaat) and fresh mozzarella from Casa della Mozzarella on Arthur Avenue in the Bronx.  This is the stuff that dreams are made out of.  I am almost hesitatnt to publish these little gems (because I feel like they're my secret) but they will actually change your life.  Aside from the fact that the bread is from my family's bakery...it's hand-crafted and baked in-house as it has been for the past hundred or so years; so deliciously salty, crusty, and filled with more olives than you can imagine.  The only thing better than being baked inside a loaf of this and eating your way out is topping a slice with Casa's fresh mozzarella, which is still warm when you buy it because they make it throughout the day in the back of the tiny shop on 187th street.  HOLY YUM.

It's more than worth the trip out of Manhattan.  You can thank me later.

*My family is strangely obsessed with basil.  I think I was the only college student growing basil in my dorm room...and have some growing out on my fire escape now.

I Love New York

I've been feeling a bit restless lately.  I talked about it in my previous post-- the post college "itch" (I hate that word and will think of a new term... you're welcome)-- and I've started to think that now might be a great time for a change.  I'm not married, I don't have a house, or a mortgage, or a serious boyfriend, or a dog, or really anything that would require me to stay in New York.  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE New York.  I feel so lucky to live in such a wonderful city that is so full of excitement, friends, activity, and amazing food.  I really never even considered living anywhere else.

But New York can be hard on you at times.  It's easy to feel  lonely, even though you're surrounded by people.  Sometimes there actually are too many choices-- What's the best new restaurant?  Hottest wine bar?  Best park?  Greatest neighborbood?  Cheapest rent?  I've been having a seemingly inescapable feeling that I am running around and around on a hamster wheel and I am not sure what for.  Work-stress-anxiety-phones ringing-crowded streets-subway-gym-treadmill-spinning-make money-go out-spend money-buy-return...and start again.   I ran out of work last night to go to a yoga class (sprinted and got there late, of course), so it took me a good 15 sun saltuations to get my zen on.  Hour class, we say our Namaste, I roll up my mat, feeling good... and have to wait on a freaking LINE to put my blanket away.  I huffed, and I puffed, and I cut the line and threw mine on top of the pile, completely disregarding whatever folding rule everyone else was following.

Seriously?  In a yoga class?   Chicago is starting to look pretty good.  Or Portland.  Denver!  Everyone is so happy out there!

So I left, only slightly less stressed than when I started...but them something amazing happened.  That nagging feeling melted away and it turned into one of those perfect New York nights.  I met a dear friend for amazing cocktails in the East Village, had an absolutely delicious dinner, and went to the coolest, most secluded speakeasy I've ever been to.  We sat in the corner of this bar with wonderful drinks, having a great time, and some guy came over completely out of nowhere and said "you are beautiful".  To my friend, of course.  And then he actually ran away.  But in my Campari-induced fog, I couldn't stop smiling.  (ok, that was probably the drinks).  Even still, isn't that the nicest thing??  For a complete stranger to so genuinely and honestly say that someone is beautiful?  And then run away so you aren't stuck talking to them after?  Doesn't get any better than that.

Nights like that make it so hard for me to seriously consider ever leaving New York.  As long as there is a grungy back alley in alphabet city serving custom-made drinks, I'll be here too.